snippet of motherhood: technology and parenting

Today was a nutty day. I was just about to pick my oldest up from school early for an appointment when the school nurse for the youngest called saying he seemed fine but had come back for a second time today saying it hurt to swallow. No fever, good mood, just a red throat. So I scooped him up and made an appointment with the pediatrician just to rule out strep, which has been making the rounds amongst our friends. I called the middle son's school to send a message to him not to wait for his little brother and to come on home.

So now my youngest is with me to get his oldest brother at school and take him to the eye doctor. Diagnosis: quite nearsighted! He's a boy who knows what he likes and he didn't like the glasses the eye doctor had to offer. I've learned my lesson about strong-arming him into accepting things he doesn't really like/want...So we squeezed in a quick trip to a cooler glasses place and found a perfect pair (ca-ching!)...then we dropped him (oldest) at dentist and raced to the pediatrician who was not able to rule out strep because, in spite of him seeming well and not even looking like strep, he actually has a very bad case. Sigh...pick up oldest at dentist, head to pharmacy to drop Rx, head to market to buy groceries while waiting for prescription (since we will be home bound tomorrow - which reminds me, must call school and report strep & absence tomorrow...). Then picked up medicine and a few little treats and soup.

So what does this have to do with technology? Well, to keep him occupied at the eye doctor and again while waiting for the pediatrician, I allowed my youngest to play a game (Fruit Ninja? I guess my oldest loaded it because I sure didn't) on my iPad and now he's obsessed with wanting to play with it again. Here was his attempt:

him: "Mom - I was just talking with your old laptop...he's lonely. He really misses you. Maybe you should spend some time with him instead of your iPad tonight!"


me: "I don't think my laptop is a boy".

Crafty boy...I may just let him play with it as a reward for his creativity!

continuous monitoring

Did you watch the presidential debate last night? (hope so!) I did and I happened to watch it on CNN. Now CNN had an "audience reaction meter" at the bottom of the screen and do you know what? I found it mesmerizing - it was hard to take my eyes off it. Were people buying what was being said? Liking my candidate? The ups and downs - it was very distracting...I found it hard to concentrate on what they were saying, hard to just genuinely feel my own reaction and focus on the men themselves. Why didn't I just change the channel? Because I became interested in my reaction to the audience reaction and decided to ride it out, play around with the experience. See for yourself (fast forward a bit to get to the meter)

If you have read my posts before, I'm sure it's no surprise that of course this made me think about birth... and those freaking continuous fetal monitors. They can be so seductive and hypnotizing. I have seen laboring women question whether they were having good enough contractions (in spite of how hard they were working) because the monitor was not picking up well. I have seen partners, hell - I have seen myself look at the monitor instead of the woman. I've probably said ad nauseam that continuous fetal monitoring does not improve outcomes for moms & babies and that I encourage my students and clients to choose care providers who get that and are not so attached to continuous monitoring. I have also said many times, but it bears repeating I think, that while wireless monitors are great compared to wired continuous ones, the better choice for healthy women having a normal, low intervention labor is intermittent monitoring.

But what if you're stuck with a situation where continuos monitoring is what the care provider wants or some intervention like pitocin is part of the labor or it's a VBAC...or, for that matter, it's what your client wants? Well, if the family wants to control their enviromnment and make the monitor less of a presence, the carts that the monitors sit on roll and can be turned away from view (at least somewhat). The volume can be turned down or a tshirt can be tossed over it (& the clock! But be sure to mention why to the nurse and other care providers)...You do not have to let technology suck you in, unless you want it to.